Management and job prospects

I was reading an aspie blog on jobs recently, and how management is *not* recommended as a choice for aspies. It recommends staying in a technical position, lest you burn out.

I made a similar decision in my life. I had worked at a giant coffee chain for years - i started as a barista, and moved up to a supervisor position because i was hard working and because I couldn't stand incompetent people telling me how to do my job or encouraging me to cut a lot of unnecessary corners. Moving up also meant that I had more control over whether i got to do background tasks or interact with customers all day - for the same reason, early on, i got really good at cleaning tasks and working the bar.

i moved to a new state and stayed with my company, and they wanted to move me up to management. as an assistant manager, i had my first panic moments. after a rough summer where several of my staff had bad interactions with customers (being stalked, being yelled at, etc.) a guy came in to complain and yelled a bunch of ugly things at me, and i called the cops and had him removed. my boss thought i had not done enough to appease him. all i knew is that someone was in my store and screaming at me, and i considered it good enough that i didn't run away or start screaming back, particularly when the insults got personal.

fast forward - i was meticulous and the staff liked that i was willing to work hard despite being a manager and that i treated people fairly. i didn't tolerate the social drama that other managers fostered. i knew all of my facts and learned quickly. i was already uncertain by this point, but i got my own store to run.

my intentions were good, and my new staff grew to love me for being fair and for advocating for them. but i was always really bad at disciplining people who needed it, and i found it hard to cope when i wasn't sure someone was lying to me. my boss really knew how to get under my skin and emotionally manipulate me - i felt really fragile, and i felt like she exploited that to shame me into doing well more than i needed to do. i spent 55-60 hours a week at my store to try to get things done right. i was constantly on call, and my precious downtime was never fully mine.

so when i decided to move, i realized that i didn't want to continue to be a manager. i decided that entry level positions would be good for me while i went back to school and pursued a career where i could actually be creative and work alone sometimes. of course, lots of entry level positions are part time, and i need to work several jobs to make the money i need, and as you can see from the last post, that's not working out so well, either.

i'm putting my love of research into a website project that i can hopefully launch into a successful business. i know that i'll need some help on the broader organizational issues, but i'm hoping that i can create something viable and not have to work outside the house so much. we'll see.